Lucifer S03E21 Review – Anything Pierce Can Do, I Can Do Better

This show is starting to piss me off again and royally this time. Having said that, I can’t believe I actually care again.

Anyway, this episode is book-ended to the end of the last episode. Lucifer and Pierce have discovered that Pierce’s mark is gone and he is now vulnerable. Are you ready for a plot twist that everyone saw coming? Pierce is vulnerable because Chloe loves him which must mean that Chloe has loved Lucifer since just after they met. It couldn’t have been in the first episode because Lucifer got shot all those times in front of Chloe so maybe love hadn’t quite set in but she must have really loved him when she shot him in the leg. Nothing says ‘I Love You’ like a bullet to the thigh.

The next day, Chloe is upset and Ella confronts Pierce. He says that he was stupid for making that decision and he’s going to win back Chloe.

Time for the case. This week, a murdered ballerina. But that’s not very interesting because the person who killed her could be seen from a mile away. What is interesting is Lucifer trying to compete Pierce. We all know that Chloe loves both of them but who does she love more? That is the question. When Chloe rips a leaflet out of Lucifer’s hand, she inadvertently gives him a paper cut… which bleeds.

Lucifer recites his findings to Dr Linda and comes to the conclusion that he is going to consistently one up Pierce’s romantic advancements so that Chloe will realise that Lucifer is better for her and things will go back to normal. What Lucifer doesn’t realise (and the entire point of this exchange) is that if Chloe realises that she’s completely head over heels in love with Lucifer then things will never be the same. When Lucifer leaves, Dr Linda realises she should have stopped him.

Lucifer’s first attempt is to bring Chloe an Irish Coffee and a lemon bar (her favourite) but is too late as Pierce has already delivered a whole plate of home-baked lemon bars. Pierce’s next attempt is to fill her car full of roses. Lucifer’s response? To buy her a car. Of course, Chloe rejects this gift telling Lucifer that it’s ‘not about stuff’.

Let’s move on to the B plot. Lucifer ropes in Amenadiel to help with bringing down Pierce. He doesn’t Pierce dead just out of the way. Amenadiel is all for this plan so approaches Charlotte Richards for help. Lucifer gives Amenadiel the crucial information that Pierce was connected with the Sinnerman so he has criminal connections. Charlotte Richards is trying to buy her way into Heaven and so accepts the task of doing some good. Amenadiel and Charlotte Richards follow Pierce to a meeting with a known criminal. An envelope goes to Pierce and the criminal gets money. It really shouldn’t be too hard to guess what’s in the envelope. I knew immediately and my blood started to boil.

Remember Maze? She’s back and her grand plan was revealed. Pierce calls off the plan that they both cooked up when he realised that he didn’t want to hurt Chloe and here was their plan. Pierce was going to make Chloe fall in love with him so his mark could get removed. Maze was then going to murder him and pin the murder on Lucifer. This somehow would help her get back to Hell. Not quite sure how. Maze is still dead set on her own plan and so goes to Chloe to ‘apologise’ and make things right. Trixie doesn’t feel the same way.

The episode gets towards the end and Lucifer is running out of time. Chloe gets a phone call from Pierce telling her to have dinner with him that evening. Lucifer steps in first and books an appointment earlier in the evening at his penthouse. When Chloe arrives, Lucifer has set up a beautiful romantic dinner for two with champagne and everything. He sits her down, pours her a glass of bubbly. Chloe asks Lucifer what all this is about. He says he’s going to ask her something. By now I’m shouting at the screen ‘DO IT NOW! ‘. But alas, Lucifer ruins the whole thing by talking. He asks her ‘Isn’t this better than anything Pierce could do?’. Well done, Lucifer… you absolute cock. Chloe gets upset when she realises that Lucifer isn’t going to profess his love for her telling him ‘You can’t have it both ways’ and she’s right.

After they catch the killer, Lucifer realises what an arse he’s been. All he had to do was tell Chloe his feelings for her but he screwed it up. As he sits alone drinking in his penthouse, Dr Linda drops by to tell him basically what I’ve been yelling about for the whole series. Stop making excuses as to why he can’t be with Chloe and to tell her how he feels. Who cares about God’s involvement, he loves her and she loves him so get on with it. It’s the best thing for both of them. Lucifer leaves for Chloe’s house.

Still haven’t figured out what was in that envelope? It’s an engagement ring. DUH! Why couldn’t have bought one at the jewellers? Like a normal person? Oh yeh, because then there would be a reason for Amenadiel and Charlotte Richards and the audience to think that Pierce was a dirty copper.

Pierce shows up at Chloe’s place, gets down on one knee and does his whole speech. Of course, she accepts because she’s stupid and all of this is watched by a heartbroken Lucifer.

To sum up, all of this will come to an end. The audience are pissed off now. Well… I’m pissed off, I don’t know about you. I’m going to make a prediction. In the final episode or near the final episode, Pierce is going to go away. I’m guessing that his little plan with Maze will be uncovered, most likely by her and this whole relationship with will come to an end. Hopefully, Lucifer will declare his love for her and it’s about time he show her his wings. Either he shows her or she finds out by accident. Either way, it’s about time she finds out. Til next week.

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